Flowering

I just have a few things to say... and for once I have been able to have a day where I am able to sleep past noon, walk around my house naked, cook breakfast without having to rush off to work, bathe, clean, sage, dance and (drum roll please...) WRITE!

Have you been feeling it?? Or is your unconscious conscious taking over? You know, the Jimminie Cricket in the coat of a different color that doesn't really have any sound advice, but tricks you into thinking what you are hearing must be correct and sound because you are simply hearing it and are not checking in with the facts. Yeah, he's around for some people, dare I say most. I see him chillin' on a lot of shoulders in San Francisco, whispering sweet nothings and fruitless dreams to the ears that are open to hearing any little peep, because some days those ears don't hear one damned nice thing, and those eyes are glazed over from lack of affection and love.

We are in a fragile state, my friends. One where some people sleep on the streets and have no pennies or bread while others are jet-setting off to Tahiti for Mai-Tai's and fresh Ahi. Don't get me wrong, one of my goals is to be able to have an 'eco-friendly' private jet so my friends and I can island hop and enjoy the bountiful gifts of our Mother. (Yes, I said eco-friendly jet. If we can make it to outer space, I'm sure someone can come up with a way to fly a couple thousand feet without using oil in this lifetime. Call it what you wanna call it. I call it hopeful. Teleportation, maybe?)

What I am saying is that the balance is off. Until world peace can happen, there has to be an uproar of sorts so that the full expression of balance can come to fruition. We must know the white, black and grey to see the whole spectrum of color. If it's not, the full potential will still be clouded and unfulfilled. And so above, so below, right? In other words, If the collective is striving for balance, we ourselves as individuals must also do the work. This is where it begins. Right now, we are seeing what is a manifestation of... well, a collective uproar with everyone occupying everything. This is a good thing! People are standing up and saying, "WTF? When is the madness going to end?!", which is amazing. And I commend each and every person who is willing to put their lives on hold to make such a bold, outward statement. But another fact of the matter is that people are losing it-- reaching toward drugs, alcohol, shopping, sex, food, lofty ideals-- whatever it is that makes them forget about the current state of affairs within and in their external environments. I'm not saying I'm an abstinent, pure angel exuding white light all around me. I have partaken in ALL of those distractions, and I will say they probably have saved my life a time or two hundred when I thought I was going to loose my marbles. And I will also say some of them have been extremely mind and heart opening leading to moments of great healing. Thank God my body is resilient and has made it through the times of destruction.

But still, the balance is off. We have to go WITHIN! Especially if we are intending to make such a strong shift, we must be able to stand firmly on the ground beneath us and root down into the Earth. It's easy these days to float off to never-never land, but we always have to return home. Home truly is where the heart is. Your heart center-- your hridayam. The place of love and possibility! When we are home and settled, doors begin to open. We can't will the doors to open with the force of our minds or bodies. (Well, we can, but that shit could come back to hit us in the ass, and until we've have some pretty solid Jedi training, I suggest relying on the heart.)

So however you need to do it-- maybe it's getting better sleep, eating and drinking wisely and in moderation, chew your food, watch the sugar, don't be a hussy, get some yoga and meditation flowing in your life, ask yourself if you can do more with less. Do you really need those $100 stretchy pants, especially if Chase Bank is paying for them up front and you promise to pay them back later??

Get straight. There are plenty of people who are on the path and have found answers to the issue of finding balance. And it's because they themselves have been out of balance before. They have been open to experiences in the white and in the black and now reside somewhere in the grey. Their lotus flower has opened many of its petals and their true selves have emerged from the center-- their heart cave.

For more info on the heart cave, check out Be Here Now, by Baba Ram Dass. Life changer! It might help you find some balance. 

On a final note, please be nice to everyone. I see so much attitude swirling around and it's disheartening. If you are in a place where you feel like you need to have an attitude, check yourself and let someone know you are having a hard time. If they can't understand, then you don't need to be around them anyway. Are you kind? Are your thoughts/words/actions necessary, beneficial and timely? If not, ask for help. The flowering within comes from a humble place. The outward expression of that flower, individually and collectively, will innately be beautiful if we start with humility, or self-love. Now go love yo' self!  

The Girl with Flowers in her Hair, On Love

Ahhhh the keyboard. I've been missing its touch upon my fingertips. For a few months I haven't had a chance or the mental focus to sit down and write anything more than an email, a facebook post (and sometimes those words are even hard to get out), or a hand-written note that only gives me limited paper space, so needless to say, my fingers have been at rest.

So, I'm in San Francisco now and have been for about two months. (Well right now now, I am on a train back to there from Sacramento with no iPhone to keep me distracted, but I DO have my computer without internet. Thus, a word doc and infinite pages.) So, I'm in San Francisco-- and am LOVING it. It takes a lot of energy to be there, but the energy feeds me sweetly, like how a baby gets fed from it's mother's breast, as if it’s the most necessary, nutrient-filled substance known at the moment. Of course, this intense form of energy requires frequent retreats to ensure a balance is being kept throughout my koshas.

Speaking of balance, let's talk about our 20's. Whew! What. A. Whirlwind! A fun one, for sure, among many other words that we could pull out of thin air to describe something that most of us have either been through, are going though currently, or may be quickly approaching. What I do know now that I am more than half way through is that truth is hidden unless you keep your eyes and ears wide open and your heart full of trust, hope and inspiration. If the doors are starting to close too early and we take the rocky road (oohh yummy), then we have that many more hurdles to climb over or move out of the way. I guess you could try to go through them too. There really is no right way. The way is the way is the way-- for you and me and he and she. Some of us get to this part of the road sooner and some later, and it's not just the 20's-- it keeps going, at least that's what I hear!! Awww what I'm finding is that this either excites or scares people. It's exciting when you see the light in others and can easily recognize it-- an instant connection and bubbling up of love inside. But, when someone or something is different than you are or how you want them to be or how you are used to other people being, there is a moment of hesitation, fear, ego-based reaction, that SCREAMS uncomfortability. No matter the age, I think what this time is about is figuring out the difference between love and fear, accepting that love is greater than fear (holler, Victoria) and learning how to ride the wave of love without falling off.

Then you meet people like the nice man that I exchanged a few words with in the food car of the train to give you a little shot of love from an unexpected source just to show you that it comes in all shapes and colors.... Let's just say that today, I look like I have time-warped from the Upper Haight in 1968 and this man is a modern-day Tenderloiner. J

Nice man: "Heeeey flower child. Are you gonna free the world or what?"

Me: "Hey man, I'm gonna try my best."

Nice man: "(As he passes my seat to leave the train), Free the world, girl. Free the world."

You never know. You never know where the sources of trust, hope and inspiration are going to come from. But what we can know is that we really are all one. (And no I didn’t go to Burning Man, but I did officiate a wedding yesterday for some dear friends, Shelly and Aaron.) Talk about love. Standing inches away from the real deal, true love, and seeing it their eyes as they exchanged vows, tears and ecstatic joy was such a palpable experience-- one that will be hard to forget and is already leaving me wanting more. (Aaron and Shelly, I love you guys! So honored to stand on that hill with you and usher in the next chapter of your lives!)

Love is sweet and oh so kind. I would go as far as to say that the world is sweet and oh so kind. It's just a matter of accepting it into your realm of reality. Like attracts like. Love attracts love. Hate attracts hate. And fear attracts fear. What do you attract? I choose like and love. Really, I am inspired to just choose love. Why not, right? More fun. Less stress. And a hell of a lot more beautiful. So go smell some flowers, talk to a "stranger", let your bones smile so brightly that you can't even hold back on your face, and see if a little bit more love can flourish within and around you. It's an important task right now. The world needs us to free it, one little thought and one little action at a time. 

Wings and Roots

Whew! It's been awhile. Partly because my computer has not been available to me, and partly because I have been having to put my little angel wings on and FLYYYYYYYYYYY from place to place, home to home, couches to cushions to beds, friends to other friends, old and new, family, yoga trainings, through millions of insights, down rabbit holes and back toward the light. Let me tell you, this work is not easy. No WONDER I haven't had a job the past few months!! -- I wouldn't have TIME for one!

On February 24, 2011, I lost something near and dear to me. It is a necklace with a big beautiful red and blue bloodstone on a dark silver chain. In Maui, I learned that it is a grounding stone and blood circulator, to name a few of its healing powers. Something to help keep my feet on the ground and my heart pumping. I got that damn thing at Bows and Aarows in Midtown Sacramento about a year ago. The owner gave it to me. She said she thought I should have it, so I took it. So generous of her. (Thanks Trisha!) Anyway, I wore that thing EVERY day. It never came off. Until Malia's birthday party. Not sure why it came off... maybe it got in the way of mine and Maureen's way as we hula hooped our way through her backyard under the bright stars, surrounded by the light of tiki lamps. (Can you tell I miss Maui?? :)) So, as I said, I lost it. We couldn't find it anywhere. I was bummed. I loved that thing. Soon after, though, I was able to send it my love and part with it-- it obviously wasn't supposed to be with me anymore.

A few days ago, June, 28, 2011, I check Theresa's mailbox and I have a package. Yay! (I was expecting two sooner or later.) It's from Maureen. She sent me my passport in a small post office flat box, and at the bottom was bubble wrap. "Hmmm, what's this?", I asked Maureen. Unwrapped it and tears filled my eyes! The bloodstone came to the rescue!! Thank Goddess, God, Spirit, Jesus, all of 'em! Right when I need to tuck the angel wings in and get my feet back on the ground, it shows up in my lap. Thank. God.

The reason why this is exciting to me is because I just got a job in SAN FRANCISCO working for lululemon. Dude. So amazing. This is the company of my dreams. Not even kidding. They completely support their employees in flying high and growing roots, equally. They encourage individuality within the team, creativity, and push their employees toward greatness. I AM GRATEFUL.

So, I landed this past Monday in the heart of SF. I'm here, aaaaand living in a convent. ???? Yes, a convent. Built in the early 1900's with two floors of rooms that are filled with artists of all sorts, an industrial kitchen (woo woo!), a chapel, basement and rooftop (all good places for yoga sessions). The water pressure in the showers is even perfect. Again, SO grateful.

I'm not sure what San Francisco is supposed to be teaching me, but I am keeping my mind quiet enough so I can listen clearly, and in the mean time continue to explore new territory, people, yoga studios and teachers, ideas, farmer's markets, rabbit holes and rooftops.

If I have learned anything in the past 6 months, I would have to say my greatest lesson is to listen deeply-- to myself, to others and to the Spirit that lies within all things, seen and unseen. From words in books to the guy sitting next to me on the bus, the Spirit resides. It's there. It's all the same thing! When we can see that, when we can get past the physical manifestation of the Spirit in form, we begin to see the true nature and interconnectedness of it all. Sometimes subtle, sometimes totally in your face. Either way, it's good. Then our attitude shifts toward the light rather than the dark. Then our eyes open a little bit wider. Then magic starts to happen every once in a while. Then that same magic becomes a regular occurrence. Belief begins to set in. Doubt slips away. Belief becomes stronger than doubt, to the point where doubt feels like a foreign emotion when it slithers its way back into your mind on occasion. Trust blossoms within, and you are free to take flight into the unknown. Scary? Yes, at first.

"Do one thing a day that scares you." - lululemon manifesto

So, we take the leap! With courage and with gratitude. We are always fully supported and protected. I promise you. Align with your true nature and all will unfold as it should. (The coolest part is that the unfolding process just keeps on getting better and better!!!) Magic and beauty surrounds!

Loving Differences. Yummy!

So, I'm having somewhat of a dilemma. Here it is: I feel like there are rays of light shining out of each and every one of my pores. Tiny little bright beams of light that I just can't seem to turn off. Not even in my sleep! Doesn't sound so bad does it?! The obvious answer, or at least the obvious one that I would be more inclined to say if someone put me on the spot and asked me that question and said I only had two seconds to respond is- NO! Not bad at all! GOOD! GREAT! 

You might be surprised, however, to discover how much resistance I receive from some of our fellow human beings. Like, maybe they would feel better about being around me if they were able to wear some sunglasses. That's fine. I say wear them. Shield your eyes so you can stand the shine, and stick around long enough to soak up some of the vitamin D that could be available to you when we meet, because God knows I have plenty to go around lately and I don't mind sharing. :)

Here's the dilemma. I feel one way (bright and shiny) and external forces tend to either make me brighter or dimmer. I suppose this is a good thing-- it helps to align my lioness tendencies more toward a balanced place. So, I guess there is really no dilemma anymore. What we need now is a solution!

The solution(s) (per Noah Maze-- (thank you Noah for putting this into clear, concise words)): CELEBRATE! Tolerate. Take Action!

1. CELEBRATE!: OMG how amazing is it that we are all different. It would be exhausting if we were all the same wouldn't it???! I mean, we would have to convince someone to go pave the roads (God knows I don't want to do that, but someone does!). We would have to convince someone to roast the coffee, deliver the babies, own and operate the corner market, fly the planes and answer the phone at Verizon when I need to make an upgrade. That's a lot of convincing! So, we celebrate! We celebrate our differences on all levels- physically, mentally, emotionally AND spiritually. Sometimes this is the quickest way to dissolve the discomfort we may get by coming face-to-face with a difference. If this doesn't work for you, try the next one.

2. Tolerate. If there is no serious harm being done to you or to someone else when a difference is presented, can you tolerate it? Can you take a deep breath, see it for what it is, and move on knowing that that person or situation is playing it's role in the grand scheme of things, and it's probably playing that role quite beautifully?! Probably. And if not, it's just showing us the opposite of what it could mean to be beautiful given the set of circumstances and the way the stars have aligned for that person, for you, and the situation at that very given moment giving us a more broad view of the full expression of what it means to be 'it' at that point in time. Dang. In fewer words, it is what it is for what it's worth. Done and done. Moving on. But, if that still doesn't satisfy the craving to react (or hopefully respond) to this human experience, you have one more option. Thankfully.

3. Take action! Thank God for this option, right? Thank God there is an option that allows us to express our feelings rather than keeping them bottled up inside which usually leads to a bigger blow up than is ever necessary. We should take action when we truly recognize that there is harm, hate, violence or destruction in the equation. This negative vibration I am speaking of is totally petty, unnecessary and almost always avoidable. The key to freedom from blowing up at someone or something prematurely: silence. Silence says so much more than noise sometimes. Silence allows us to assess the situation, then (guess what?) we GET to respond rather than react. How exciting, right? I think so. It also gives us time to go inside and try to get to the root of why the difference flips an emotional switch within us in the first place. I encourage you to go there first, assess your TRUTH, then do your best to respond with the most positive vibration you can muster up in the moment. Sometimes it only takes a moment of silence to hear the real truth and sometimes it takes years. And of course, it's all a practice. So, if we fly off the handle too soon, we get a chance to recognize what happened (which is usually in the form of a release of negative energy) and do our best to heal with light and love when we can. Simple, not easy, of course.

So, there it is my friends. Easy as 1, 2, 3! :) And if it's not that "easy" for you, I suggest you take a look at why not?? It's a shift in perspective that is truly is available to all of us no matter what our astrological signs are or how we were raised. Let the guard down, trust the process, soften into the light and breathe in the goodness! Yummy.

Let Me Count the Ways...

Dear Sacramento,

How I love thee.

Sunday night I was able to make it back to you from LA. From one love to another, the wheels of cars and trains got me back home. This time, with no agenda. This time, just to be here, breathe in the Spring air, visits friends and family, and to simply enjoy you. A place I used to take slightly for granted. Sacramento, you hold a special place in my heart-- you and all of your people (who are my people too), your places (so quaint, friendly, familiar), and your things (trees, flat roads to ride bikes on and farmer's markets).

Ohhh but how I do miss Maui and LA. I know what you are going to say... "LA already, Anna?? You just left!!" I know, I know. LA, yes. The "plan" is that we can be in an official relationship in the next few months rather than random few-night-stands every now and then. I hope you can understand. I can hopefully even update my relationship status on my facebook. It's THAT official.

Before then, I must have another engagement with Maui. We still have to surf together and soak up some sun on the beach. I will have to say my goodbyes so I can welcome a new home base into my life. If I could write this same letter to Maui I would say, "Maui, it's not you, it's me. No really! I promise. I am just needing a little more stimulation than you can offer me!! No hard feelings, I still love you and always will. You, and your people, places and things." The same goes for you, S. I really do love you. You will always hold tons of space in my heart. It's just that since the beginning of the year, I've come down with a serious case of the travel bug. I can't seem to shake it yet, so I'm just letting it do it's thing until it wears off.

Sending you LOVE, blessings and LIGHT from my being to yours!

-xoxo-

Anna

....And the love notes continue. I have to say living a life where you really don't have a home is, well, quite interesting to say the very least. Interesting, exhilarating, difficult and easy at the same time. If I could sum it up in one word, I must say more than anything, it's rewarding. ???? Rewarding?? Not having a home?? Floating from one place to another?? Interesting.

But yes!! Rewarding!! For years I have been trying to find the shoe that fits. The shoe that feels the most comfortable at the moment, and right now, this shoe fits. Call it the case of the travel bug, or call it lucky circumstances, or call it crazy!! Either way, it fits. We all need something different in our lives at different times. Some people are happy wearing the same pair of shoes for 20 years and some people change their shoes three times a day. I'd like to think I wear a pair (or two) a day. (In all reality, I've had four pairs with me for the past month-- a neon yellow pair of sandals, vintage cowboy boots, some wedge heels, and my bare feets.) Each one serves a different and useful purpose. More than that would make it tough for my suitcase to close, and if you have ever been on the road, you know how much that could suck. My job is to assess what pair is most fitting for the day ahead.

What I am trying to say and the honest truth is that relationships don't have to be as difficult as we can sometimes make them out to be. Right?? It's like the case of the travel bug, and the case of the shoes. If we can embody that, it can serve us. The travel bug offers a sense of freedom that could be harder to attain while staying in a relationship that isn't necessarily serving the highest good.  So, change the shoes. If the new pair doesn't fit the circumstance, change them again! Maybe this makes sense to me because I am 25-years old lady with no responsibilities and am able to "choose" my shoes on a daily basis. But the purpose of this post is to open your eyes to the possibility that you, yes you, can choose and change your shoes at anytime if they are uncomfortable or causing you blisters. :)

The example of the shoes is a micro-perspective on the bigger picture. The point is that if we can zoom out to see our whole outfit for the day, we can see what kind of shoe not only fits the best but also looks good and allows us to feel confident in our own skin. The confidence will help to shape the world around us and get us into the VORTEX!!!

Have you heard of this concept about the vortex?? If not, take a listen....

The vortex is where I like to live these day. I seek it. It's where I feel the best, the most confident and my outfit and shoes look the best all together. The vortex is when we are not fighting. When we are free. When we are not worried about what might happen to us in the future. It's where we can zoom out from the present moment and see the big picture while still being able to keep some amount of focus on the present. Tricky, but completely accessible all of the time. It just takes practice!

I've had so many people mention to me how they would LOVE to do what I am doing now. I say to them, I invite you to explore the option, but also to take a look at how good you may have it. If the current pair of shoes really really doesn't fit, change them out! And if they are you favorite shoes so far and the sole still has a pretty thick layer, keep em on baby until you can't comfortably wear them anymore.

Then dance, and dance and dance and dance. Count the ways you could be in love with the present moment. If you really can't be in love, take them off-- go barefoot until the right pair comes along. Keep your eyes open. It's all a matter of perspective. Love your shoes and your city. Hopefully we will grow to appreciate and love all shoes and all cities. Then, we are free. Then, we can experience bliss even when we are getting blisters.

Gypsy Living

Well, the title of the post says it all. I am officially a gypsy. Talk about letting go....

And with no "home" to call my own, no car, a dwindling bank account, three pairs of shoes and a suitcase, the journey continues. This may explain why my posts have been few and far between lately. But trust me, the keyboard calls my name all too often. My fingers long for the dance. I justify it by trying my best to fully soak up what is happening in front of my face so when I do return to the page, everything that has been collected in my memory can flow freely. So here we go!

I can try to catch you up on the going-ons in my life, but it might take all night to explain. You probably don't want to read about that anyway. Instead I will attempt to share with you the lessons learned along the path.

Lesson #1: Stay on the path.... Because it is oh so easy to stray. I am so lucky-- lucky to be alive. Lucky to have the gift of a healthy body and mind. If you are saying to yourself, "Well I'M not healthy, so I'M not lucky!", then you are lucky for something else. You have all the tools you need. Chances are you are reading this from the comfort of somewhere (home, coffee shop, work, the beach on your iPhone) through some kind of technologically advanced device (computer, "smart"phone). If you have those things, you have more than most people do-- You are lucky. This also means you have said tools at your fingertips. TAKE ADVANTAGE! With today's advancements, we have access to an abundance of information that can help us to better our bodies and minds. Ever heard of YogaGlo?? $18/month gets you unlimited yoga from master teachers and all you need is an internet connection. My point is that it is easy to be lazy and being lazy for too many moments in a row usually leads to us taking a few steps away from our intended path. Which leads to my next lesson...

Lesson #2: "Be who God meant for you to be and you will set the world on fire!" -- Bishop of London at the Royal Wedding. We all have a purpose, otherwise we wouldn't be here. When we came into this world, when our vibration decided to take physical form, we had a mission to accomplish. It's almost as if life is a game. (That makes it really really exciting.) One of our first tasks is to figure out what that mission is, then we can map it out. We can trace our little steps strategically until we reach the goal. The funny part is that sometimes we find out what this is really early and sometimes really late. Sometimes we don't even know we are doing what we were put here to do. And sometimes it's crystal clear. The bottom line is that until we know, the search must go on and if it doesn't then we are like feathers in a windstorm (which has been a literal and figurative reality for me recently!). Seek your path. Open your eyes. Enjoy the ride!

Lesson #3: ENJOY THE RIDE! When we trust the process, the universe and God (if you can fathom that idea) we can soften into our being, our vibration and our surroundings. Then!!, each breath has a chance to be smooth. Deeper even! Thank GODDESS for the breath. This one little thing which comes so freely to us in any given moment is our gateway to enjoyment. When we hesitate is when we suffer. When we place judgement or get angry because shit doesn't work out like we want it to, we are blocking the flow of the universe that is working through us. We are not letting be what is supposed to be. It's not that serious!!! We just think it is. :) Trust. Soften. Breathe. 1. 2. 3. Simple. As. That.

Lesson #4: Gratitude-- the gateway drug. So so important. So important that I am tempted to move it up to lesson #1. Thanking your lucky stars for what you have been given could possibly be the very thing that will allow more doors to open for you. EVEN if in the moment life is throwing you up against a brick wall over and over again, thank the wall for trying to knock some sense into you. It will continue to give you headaches until the message is clear, so do your best to become friends with it. Once peace is made, the wall crumbles, the karma is cleared and we can move forward. It's magic!! (And addicting once we get the hang of how it works.) Hence the nickname. :)

Oh, man. Thank goddess. Thank you thank you thank you for these lessons. These, my friends, are the very things that are keeping me sane along my journey. Never in my wildest dreams did I think that I would be happy without a "home". The best lesson of all is learning that home is everywhere and nowhere all at the same time. Shiiiiiit, talk about being lucky. THAT is a gift-- priceless.

NOW GO EXPLORE! HAVE FUN!! BREATHE! And don't forget to say thank you.

Ace of Wands

There is a spider the size of two quarters crawling around on the ceiling in my room. Might be a cane spider, but can't be certain. Either way, it has been in here for two days, at least. My nervous system is not begging me to unzip my skin so it can sneak away to safety without the 8-legged angel catching its shadow. My heart is not pounding blood through my veins.

I am calm, and actually sensitive toward our shared space--it's inviting, to both of us.

What I am trying to say, is that ANYTHING is possible right now. Anything. When we stop to take a closer look, we surprise ourselves. That is, if we are in the mood to be surprised. If not, status quo it is. There's nothing wrong with that, unless of course you draw the Ace of Wands from the tarot deck on a random Sunday evening after a long day of service and networking.

I haven't written in a while because, well, I've been busy. My energy has been directed toward shooting laser beams of magic out of my whole being rather than through my fingertips into the keys. To be completely honest too, I my plate is fuller now than it ever has been--and I don't even have a job! Africa in two and a half months, going back to Sacramento (details to follow), fundraising, making new connections, getting over old ones, selling my broken car and manifesting a new one, finding a new home (not house, home), establishing my career as a yoga teacher AND finding time to connect to nature and my inner most needs, wants and desires while trying to discern what is truth and what is a "story" that is no longer serving me.

The Ace of Wands is all about creative, fiery power, vitality and passion. With this wand, if you can dream of it, consider it yours. If you want to walk all the way across a rainbow, you can probably grow wings and make it happen. If you want to go to Coachella to party with rock stars, meet inspiring people, teach donation yoga classes and sell the hottest jewelry on the market to all the women who deserve to be wearing it, then book the ticket already, because you are meant to be there. If not, if you can't even think of these possibilities, let alone DREAM of them, I suggest you consult the cards-- or just skip the cards and sit quietly. The answers always come no matter the medium.

As for me, Ace of Wands it is. I'm ready to ride that wave without grabbing on to anything familiar or solid. Speaking of, mmmm, Sacramento definitely taught me how to let go. Two and a half weeks was plenty of time to spend in my hometown. A town that has served me as if I was a goddess for most of my life and continues to do so even today as I sit on this sacred land mass in the middle of the ocean. I still hear her voice and the voices of her ancestors. I still can feel her faint touch caressing my thoughts as they glide through the inner workings of my soul as if they were silken sheets covering my body as a warm wind blows through the open bay windows in the night-- soft and sensual, comfy as hell, yet unnecessary. Who really needs (or even wants) silk sheets for more than a night?

I gained tons of insight in Sacramento- mostly about relationships. Many old behaviors and patterns were magnified, much clarity was gained and several lotus flowers waiting to emerge from the mud had the chance to see the light of day. Thank GODDESS!

Now, with the power of the cosmos behind me, really and truly, anything seems possible... Even this...

...And Coachella, Africa, fundraising, a new home and silk sheets, but only when I'm feeling lavish. There is no time like the present. No time like buckling down and living out life's wildest fantasies. No time like throwing all you own to the wind to chase your dreams and make them come true. Now, amidst the chaos, terror and confusion lies salvation. This is not a myth and it is not a new-age idea. It is the law of the universe: The unity of opposites, according to Heraclitus. For every "bad" there is "good". For every time our Mother Earth purges because of her man-made sickness, more balance is created. Just as our own bodies can heal themselves, so can our planet.

I will draw from the deck once more before I leave you for the night... What must be shared with the collective?

Ten of Swords- Ruin!! "...This card reflects your entire negativity, your self-hatred, your fear of going crazy. The areas of your life that were founded on illusions are losing their apparent solidity and are breaking apart like a house of cards. You are afraid to admit this is happening because you fear the downfall of your unconscious lies and resultant chaos... You can choose to go through this low point. To do so, you will need courage, daring to take risks, and honesty... recognize your fears for what they are: projections. Get up very close to the screen on which you are projecting your terrifying images and you will see that the screen is just an innocent white surface." -G. Ziegler

Honor the downfall. Let go. Chase your dreams! If you hold back, there will be ruin. If you let go, prepare to dive into new depths of your soul. The cards don't lie...