Last week I vowed to take a digital detox from my phone and internet (including facebook and blogging!!). Not so easy, so I commend all that have successfully completed this vow. The internet detachment was not too bad, especially because the connection at home is shaky and coffee here at the local shops with a wireless hookup costs a little more than what it should. (I need to save my dollars for the fabulous kombucha up the street rather than a mediocre cappuccino anyway.) Reflecting on the experience allows me to truly say life is grand without it. I WILL say it's less stressful and helps me to focus on the now- what's actually in front of my face rather than what's on a computer screen. The more difficult part of the vow was the phone. I lasted one whole day. Pathetic? Maybe. Whatever. What I can say, though, is that without my phone, I would still be jobless and car-less. This week, the climb to the top of both of those volcanoes were accomplished. But it wasn't too much of a climb. Maybe it was more like a ski lift (if you could ski on volcanoes... which could have been possible this week in Maui. There was snow on the top of Haleakala). Smooth sailing to the top!! Mama Maui just keeps providing for me with so much tenderness- I am grateful. I feel blessed. Which leads me to what's going on inside....
PRAYER! Jesus, Shiva, Krishna, God, whatever you want to call 'it', the 'it' that allows us to speak and hear our thoughts is alive and well within my being. I can feel it, kinda like the way it feels when you get butterflies in your tummy. But these ones are there all day long and I believe they are there into the night as I rest.
I grew up going to a Catholic school for 9 years. Never once have I felt what I am feeling now when I talk to God. I know deep down in my tummy that there is truth, clarity and validity to my words as I share them with this source that I cannot see, but can only feel. You might be writing me off at this point (or maybe I am instilling more faith within you and your butterflies are starting to flutter within your own tummy too), but I don't know how else to tell you what I am feeling. This is truly a spiritual experience. Believe me or not. It is what it is. So I pray, and pray and pray and pray. This is the action, the happs, the yang. The harder part is the stillness, the listening, the yin, the mediation. Yes, I can say this part is hard for me, as it is for MOST people I talk with. Meditation doesn't come at the drop of a dime. It takes patience and persistence in sitting with the uncomfortable and the unknown. It takes faith and trust. Trusting. SOFTENING. Breathing.
This week, as I peeled myself away from technology as much as I could, I got a chance to read Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. The line that stood out most for me was this.... "Prayer is the act of talking to God, while mediation is the act of listening." So true. And as the prayers keep being asked, and most importantly, answered and fully realized into the material world, my faith continues to grow. So, the prayers keep flowing, the action stays as steady as the waves on the shore. The stillness and the listening stay at the forefront of my awareness. Patience. Persistence. The search for the balance between the two continues as the sweet, sweet nectar that secretes itself in the form of answers and gifts continue to appear. Mahalo, God. Mahalo, Maui (which is also God). And mahalo sweet friends and family (new and old), for you are also God.
Til next time, aloha!
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